And that makes a year

So the one year anniversary of my band passed unceremoniously. No bells and whistles. No champagne toasts. No victory dances. It was just an ordinary day. With only the briefest moment devoted to remembering the significance of the date.

But, as promised, here is a summary of the inaugural year of Bandit Girl:

• My band is but a tool
• I have a love/hate relationship with it. There are days where I can’t imagine and don’t ever want to be without it. And there are others I curse it as I struggle to swallow a sip of water or a teaspoon of yoghurt
• It took 8 fills and £720 to get my band reasonably adjusted but not necessarily perfect
• My scars are all but faded
• I occasionally get port pain - especially if I'm doubled over for a while or slouching
• I lost a total of 25.3kg (55.7lbs) in one year
• My friend who had surgery the same day weighed more when we were being rolled in theatre but has lost more than I have (and is significantly smaller!) in the same time frame. Truthfully, I am sometimes envious. But then I give myself the proverbial kick, wish her every good thing and realize that everyone’s journey is unique. I now fully appreciate that each person’s body will respond differently. I am so thankful that the surgery and lifestyle changes have been this successful so far
• I would like to lose another 12-14kg (26.4-30.8lbs) … I don’t have a time frame in which to achieve this
• My BMI has dropped from 37.6 to 29
• I have lost 4 dress sizes – from a 22 to a 14 but bordering on a generous size 12 fit
• I’m not so small I don’t recognize myself – other people seem to think changes are dramatic
• My bra size has gone from a 42DD to a 32H
• When it comes to picking clothing items with the heinously vague sizing: S, M, L, XL .. I am now a medium
• I have given away 6 large black bin bags of clothes including an evening gown which cost me £160 … I never got to wear it … it still had it’s tags
• I have lost a shoe size
• I have discovered I have cheek & collar bones
• I have extremely small wrists and fingers
• Rob insists my head has got smaller … go figure
• I have less cellulite on my thighs – it’s still there but you now have to get up close and personal to witness it
• My boobs still droop but not nearly as much as they use to
• I no longer have an apron tummy but I will always have a bit of a rounded tummy – wash board abs will never be mine
• I lose a considerable amount of hair and tend to bruise easily if I don’t regularly take a multi-vitamin
• I take more pride and time in myself – regular hair and beauty appointments, purchasing quality make up and underwear that makes me feel like a goddess even in my unflattering work trousers
• I will more than likely have cosmetic surgery to tidy up the aftermath
• I cannot eat bread. Or muffins. Or chicken. Or steak. Or fries.
• I can only occasionally eat pasta
• More often than not I struggle with yoghurt
• What I can eat today does not necessarily mean I can eat tomorrow
• I have had two major, kick arse chokes in the past year
• These days I very rarely choke or spit/slime … but trust me, it took almost a year to get a handle on
• I am not always hungry but eat anyway
• I am still learning to listen to my body
• When relatively well adjusted, I eat about a cup/cup & a half of food at a time
• When I’m too tight, I’m lucky if I can eat two mouthfuls
• If I over eat, I get hiccups, sneezes, watery eyes or shoulder pain. Sometimes it can be a combination of all of these!
• Most of my medications and supplements have to be in liquid or dissolvable form otherwise they get stuck in the stoma which then feels like I’m having a heart attack
• On days I still struggle with eating too much chocolate
• Nutella does not constitute a food group
• I do drink the odd bubbly beverage – alcoholic not softdrink
• I can now run
• I enjoy kick arse yoga
• My body shape changes significantly when I am regularly running and doing yoga
• I now have room to move in an airline seat
• I occasionally go for a colonic to ensure that my bowels are healthy but generally speaking, I am regular in the elimination department. I don’t need laxatives.

I don't profess to be a completely reformed individual who follows all the rules to a 'T' but I have bumbled by and got some decent results.

I am still learning stuff.

But looking back - the ups, the downs, the good, the bad, the ugly - if I had to live life over, I would definitely have surgery all over again . It was the best decision I ever made.

Must have smart pants

Okay, all you smarty pants-es out there ... you win. I am sooo not good at this regular blogging gig ... as the lack of promised summary of my tumultous year may have suggested.

I swear I kept sitting down to write it (okay, well i at least thought about it often) but I never seemed to come up with the goods. There have been things to do or someone to catch up with ... that in itself, my friends, speaks volumes ... a far cry from how I use to be. Think, hermit. Think, insecure. Think, Ugly Betty without attitude. And that may be a close summation of all that I was. Now I'm dead disappointed if a mate pulls out of a social rendevous.

But aside from the blossoming social life. I have moved house. It has been a little stressful and time consuming but I must admit, it's nice to now have a proper one bedroom apartment. The whole studio apartment arrangement began to wear thin. 2 years of living in one room will make anyone find the extra cash for a plush pad! Admittedly, I have had some ongoing problems with the landlord not doing the bits and pieces to the property as promised. I had to send Rob into the landlord's office to quietly scare the be-jesus out of them to get stuff done! Shockingly girly but effective tactic.

I have also been applying for jobs in Oz. At one point I was spending every waking hour answering assessment criteria (literally five questions which you write a short essay on)... I nearly gave up it was so daunting! But my applications are in and now I just wait.

As for my weight. Not much is happening. I'm barely eating anything and have had to go for colonics just to get a proper bowel movement. Noice, huh?! So I have decided to go and have some fluid removed so I can get proper nutrition during this last push to get to my goal weight (whatever that actually is!).

So, ummm, that's it for now people. I wouldn't bank on another titillating installment for a week or two (I'm trying reverse psychology on myself!).

Bringing sexy back

Come now, possums, don't look so shocked. How 'bout you pretend I post regularly and I will forgo my grovelling apologies for my absence ...

But in the interests of good will to mankind, I thought I might post a couple of pictures to show the wee difference between a year ago and now. On the 19th July it will be a year since I found myself in a hysterical state on an operating table in Belgium. I am now almost 24kgs lighter. But I digress ... all you want is the pictures, huh?!

I must warn you though that the before pictures are hideous ... so, may I suggest if you're eating or scare easily please look away ... I wish I was being funny ...

Ahem ... ah, people, are you sure you're ready for this ... I'm not entirely certain I am ...

At the time I knew I felt uncomfortable in my own skin but I had no real perception of just how big I had ballooned. I had an 'apron' tummy and cottage cheese thighs. My scolosis is absolutely apparent.

Gawd, I look like a happy camper in the first of the clothed shots, huh?! ... but one must be mindful, when you're lumping around almost 97kg of weight on a tiny 5' 3" frame, there's not much to smile about.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, I'm bringing sexy back. I'm still about 15kgs off my target weight but I appreciate just how far I've come and how different I now feel.

I'm a very comfortable UK/Oz size 14 or a US size 10 ... sweeeeeet! These pictures were taken a couple of days ago when I attended a royal wedding in Qatar. I felt absolutely amazing in this dress .... so much so, that I didn't really want to take it off at the end of the night!

Breasts. What breasts?! As a matter of fact, I do love them very much.

So, on or around my one year band anniversary, I will endeavour to give a relatively condensed summary of the last year. There have been the typical highs & lows ... as well as adjustments (not only with the band but with my lifestyle!), frustrations and pleasant suprises.

I know you're all going to start making bets amongst yourselves about just how long said post will take to eventuate! You doubt me?! LOL!

Just call me Princess

Hi my name is Dee and I have neglected my blogging obligations.

But I have a good reason - as always! - for being incommunicado.

Baited breath, people, baited breath.

I landed a short term contract treating a member of the Qatari Royal Family. Yeah-huh. Who would believe it?! Quietly, I am earning a tidy sum of money for doing something I love for a client who happens to be from a rather influential (a wee understatement) and wealthy (gross understatement!) family. I have been waking up for the last week and a bit pinching myself in disbelief.

I was flown from London to Doha in business class - an amazing experience if I do say so myself! I am staying in a 5-star hotel with all expenses paid. I have a driver. I have spent a mere sum of 5oGBP in the last 10 days (which is impossible to do in London).

The only down side to this venture? The hotel I am staying at does not have a pool (madness) and is one of the only 'dry' hotels in Doha (wouldn't you know it!).

That being said, I could so get use to all this.

You know what? Just call me Princess!

I plan to write a more complete account of this experience but at the moment life is a bit of a whirlwind ... no complaints mind you, no complaints!

Run baby run: Part 6

Okay. Are you all sitting down?

I ran for one hour this morning. ONE. HOUR.

STRAIGHT.

I stepped off the treadmill sopping in sweat but smiling at my achievement. One hour of continuous running with very little back pain (started tweaking at about the 4.5km mark).

I completed 7-something kilometres of running. Running 5kms in 41 mins. An improvement of 1 1/2 mins from my last run and an overall 4 mins off my first timed 5km run. Sweeeet!

My fitness keeps on improving. Strangely enough, it suprises the hell out of me just what my body can do these days. Like running. Holding a full 'plank' posture. Doing a proper push up.

How can I not love the skin I'm in?! I mean, this wee bod can break into a run or bend itself into a pretzel at the drop of a hat if I demand it .... all the while it continues to slowly burn the lard off my arse. I'm asking this baby to multi-task and you know what? She's coming up with the goods. Lovin' it!